What a humbling day. I’ve always said I’d try and be honest with you guys and in case somebody ever reads this who has some flavor of Non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma I’ll try to be as honest as I can.
Sometimes there is a certain indignity involved in all this; an indignity you have to live through to truly appreciate – although appreciate is the wrong word. Sometimes when one returns home from the type of intense aggressive chemo I've undergone since last Wednesday, there can still be a bit of incontinence/diarrhea created from the chemicals.
To my mind it is one of the most humbling things about all of this. I have often associated this with old age or some other ailment. Never in my life did I think it would happen to me; and if it did, it was years away. Such is not the case; sometimes we become the “other” guy. It can pop up (or dribble down, more like it) when you least expect it regardless of where you are or what you’re doing. Chemo don’t care! But it's okay!
It’s not as if bowel challenges are the only thing one needs to worry about either. Today I lost some motor control over my legs. I had to plod from the pharmacy to my truck, and then plod from the truck into the house. I just couldn’t get my legs to work.
Once inside the house I couldn’t move without holding on to something for dear life. I don’t know if it was a temporary form of neurotoxicity, or whether my blood levels are so low, that this was a red blood cell thing. Needless to say it scared the shit out of me. I called the doctor and I am waiting further instructions. In the interim, I parked my oversized Irish butt in a recliner and the problem eventually went away so far – fingers crossed.
Again another humbling moment.
That’s it for now. Enough depressive talk.
No comments:
Post a Comment